Bush -hogging

The big orange machine came out and ran around in our pasture this morning,  It lets the lady ride on it's back, even tho she doesn't give it carrots.  We do not think the orange machine is very smart.  It pulls a big flat noisy red thing around behind it and makes the weeds flat.  Or flattter than before, anyway.  Mostly it runs around in the parts where the manure is, because that is where the high weeds are.  The lady thinks that making the weeds flat will help the grass to grow, but really, it is the manure we put there that makes the nice grass.  We don't eat in those areas tho, so I guess that is why there are high weeds.  The orange machine ran around on the big hill in our pasture and on part of the low areas too.  A big blue gray bird with long legs landed right next to the Orange machine, but then the machine started going towards it and the bird said "Oops" and flew away.  Then a big brown bird that was sitting in the trees flew down and landed right where the weeds were flat.  It did that couple of times.  Us ponies thought when it flew away it would have a mouse, but it didn't.  We kept an eye on the lady to see if she went to one of our apple trees to throw us the apples we can't reach.  Most of our apple trees are along the fence, so we can eat some of the apples when they fall down but there are a lot of them that we can't get. There have not been any apples at all and we do not see any apples on the trees.  And the lady didn't get us any apples either.  So now most of our pasture on the big hill is flat and part of the low field is flat too.  The orange machine went around those spindly weeds that get the pink flowers.  The lady says she likes those weeds.  Us ponies don't care one way or another.  We don't eat those weeds.  When the Orange machine was done, it was all yellow and very dusty.  Even the red flat thing was yellow. It was a kind of interesting morning, but there were no carrots.  

Excitement

Ha Ha!  That Tux is so funny!  You know, Tux used to be a big pony and live with us, but now he is a little horse and lives up at the barn with his buddy Marco.   He and Marco rotate around the small paddocks and the arena to eat grass.  They don't have any fancy sheds like the rest of us ponies do, so they get to go in the barn when it gets too hot and buggy out.   The lady rides Marco in the mornings and then she takes Tux to look at stuff and get used to all the normal things that horses are not supposed to freak out about.  They get lots of treats and Tux does not like that Marco is getting treats while he, Tux, is stuck by himself in the paddock or in the stall.  This morning, the lady rode Marco around in the arena and Tux was calling him from the small paddock. When the lady took Marco back to put him in the paddock, he stopped halfway through the gate.  Tux was pretty mad about him being out and getting lots of attention and treats, so he was thinking about biting Marco.  So Tux came around the other side of Marco, but instead of biting, he turned and slipped out the gate really fast.   He was FREE!!!!!! He was SO excited!  Now, if that was me, and I had all that fetlock-deep grass underfoot, I'd start chewing for all I was worth.  But not Tux!  He galloped off into the yard and headed right for the gate.  Of course, the gate was closed, but he ran over to check it out anyway.  Then he ran along the fence looking for a way out to the road, but he couldn't find one.,  So he bolted back past the small paddock and out in the the hay field.  Hooray!  He zoomed at a full gallop around the arena in the hay field.  And again.  And again.  Then he trotted by with his flashy trot and his head all up and his tail flagging.  The lady suggested to him that he could stop getting all sweaty and get away from the horse flies if he came over to her, but he was having none of it.  He ran around the lawn and tasted some of the small trees and then ran over to check out the solar system boxes and cables that are on the barn wall.  He went around the barn ALL BY HIMSELF and came galloping straight at the bank and slid to stop right before he hit the concrete.  It was so exciting!  He was so bold!  He made sure that Marco could see him being "all that" and would be super jealous.  Marco was just upset that his BFF was running AWAY, so he called him to come back and ran along the fence.  After a while, he had made his point and walked over the lady and told her to do something about all the horse flies that were attacking him because he was all sweaty. She took him in The Pony Palace and he got many treats.  It was a very exciting morning!        

bugs and heat

Ugh, bugs.  Bugs in our ears.  Bugs biting our bellies and our necks.  Mean mean bugs.  How are we supposed to go look for nice grass when the bugs bite us as soon as we step outside of our sheds?   The lady doesn't bring us any hay any more, so now we have to look for our own grass to eat.  She still comes to see us and we run out to see if she has carrots or other nice treats, but then the bugs bite us, so we have to run back into our sheds. Sometimes she puts gooky stuff in our ears, but we hate that.  It doesn't keep the bugs away for very long.   My mom Tudi and Harley have bugs in their ears the worst.  The lady put a thing our their heads that covers their faces and ears, I guess to keep the bugs off them.  Tudi didn't like that, so after she rubbed the second one off and lost it, she didn't get any more. Harley wears his because he thinks it makes him more important than the rest of us ponies. Sometimes the lady brings other ladies back to see us, but not like she did last year when it was hot.   She spends a lot of time in that big barn without any ponies.  Today she came out with the orange machine and was running over the big weeds outside of our pasture and making them kind of flat.  Then the machine made a big racket and when she drove over the weeds, they stood right back up.   So she left and then she came walking around with a flat round thing on a stick. The thing made a funny buzzing noise sometimes, and then the lady would dig around in the weeds, but she didn't find anything. She didn't bring that buzzing thing into our pasture, but I would have walked right up to it if she had carrots.  So then she left and that was that.  The weeds are still out there.    

Brown, yellow and gray travails

Brown and yellow and gray.  Everything in our pony world is brown and yellow and gray. It is pretty boring.  There is hardly any white stuff at all.  Sometimes there is a little at night, but then the next day it turns brown.  Where there used to be nice green grass, it is brown and yellow. There are some green trees in the magical forest, but we can't get in there any more.  Most of the ponies are brown as well.  Even the black and red and gray ones are brown.  A couple of days ago, we heard the lady coming in the little green truck thing with our morning hay so we all gathered around to wait for her.  But instead of coming across the field like it usually does, the little green truck thing started going sideways and then it went backwards right into some bushes.   Usually the little green truck thing has more sense than that, but maybe it was trying to hide from something scary.  But we didn't see anything scary.  We just saw our breakfast stopping in bushes really far away.  Then the lady walked off in the opposite direction which was really disheartening.  After a long while (like forever) the big orange machine came bouncing along on it's round feet and it went over and stood in front of the green truck thing.  The lady got out and talked to the truck thing and the orange machine and then she climbed on the orange machine's back and it started to back up and the green truck thing followed it out of the bushes.  When it was out about five pony lengths, she got off the orange machine and rode in the green truck thing to bring us our hay.  Then, that afternoon, she came a different way in the green truck thing and it got all obstinate and wouldn't climb out of some brown holes that were really wet and she had to go climb on the orange machine that was still sitting in the field from the morning and it came and talked the green truck thing into bringing us our hay AGAIN.  Like it wasn't bad enough that we had to be out in wind and water that fell all day and all night and filled up the creeks and made our pastures squishy.  But last night it got cold so the water in the pastures and the creeks turned hard and gray on top.  As you know, it is very dangerous to try to walk on the flat gray ground, so us ponies try to not do that. So this morning, the green truck came down to the field with the lady and our hay, but we couldn't get over to it because we were on the side of the creek with the sheds.  The lady came walking over to see if the bridge was washed out because there was a way lot of water and the big logs that used to be along the side of the trail where we walked to the bridge were now sideways and in the way.  She stepped over the logs and walked to where the gray ground was along the bridge and Toby went and stood on the bridge to watch to see if she fell down and disappeared.  But the gray ground just crunched and brown squishy ground came up through it and she walked right through it.  Hooray!  Toby stepped on the gray ground and it turned squishy too.!   So we knew that we were saved from starvation and we all came trotting across the bridge and said Hi! to the lady.  She went one way back toward the hay and we went the way we usually go on the trail, but that was flat shiny gray ground too, so rather than risk it, we had to turn around and follow the lady across the lumpy ground with the sticks.  We finally got our hay and it was delicious.

Negativity

Us ponies are dealing with a lot of negative stuff.  As in, we are just not getting stuff.   Like, for instance, apples.  For a while, there were lots of apples.  I mean LOTS of apples.  The trees along our fields had apples and ladies would show up and throw the apples in to us that fell outside of our reach. The ladies would bring apples in the big orange machine and in the little green truck thing.  Now, no apples.  None.  And the various ladies stopped coming to see us and tell us we were beautiful and brushing our manes and tails.  The grass got really short and even tho we can tell that it is green when we look out over the field, if you run over to eat it, there is hardly anything there.  So our lady brings us hay in the big orange machine.  The orange machine is noisy, so we can hear it coming and we run over to watch it's round feet disappear into the soft wet ground.  There is a lot of water splashing around too.  Sometimes the orange machine goes sideways and we worry that it isn't going to come over to our gate, but it usually does.  The orange machine decides whether we get the hay at our gate, in the nets or by the woods where there are no nets, but where the lady can put it on the tiny grass. Sometimes, the orange machine comes to the other side of our pasture.  That was where it showed up yesterday morning, but in the afternoon, the lady came with another lady in the little green truck thing.  The hay was in the back of the truck thing, but the ladies didn't give us the hay, even though I was standing right by the rope fence and chasing away the little gray ponies who think they can boss me around (but they can't.)  The ladies had their hard shiny hats on and they carried straps that they put on Harley and Haylie's heads.  Then they led Harley and Haylie back over to where the log ring and the sheds and other gates are.  Us ponies were pretty amazed at that.  So we followed to see what was going to happen.  Along the way, the ladies gave Harley and Haylie some carrots and good treats that they had in their pockets.  That was totally unfair. When we got to the other side of the bridge, we were pretty sure that they were planning to give secret hay to Harley and Haylie, because that is where we usually get hay.  So we galloped up and flew by them and milled around to see where the secret hay was.  The ladies stood up on pieces of big logs and said "Mount up" and Haylie and Harley stood right next to them so the ladies could sit on their backs, but we wanted to get carrots and treats, so we crowded around and some of the ponies were trying to bite Haylie  (Most of the ponies know better than to bite Harley.)  So the lady got back off Harley and they went to where the rope fence will come apart and took Haylie and Harley right across the rail that is usually hanging up there.  Right by where we sometimes get hay.  And they got more CARROTS!  It was insufferable behavior!  We thought about rushing through the rope and rail, but then we ran down the fence line and started calling for them to return immediately and to bring the secret hay or regret it forever.  Haylie didn't know what to think.  She was getting treats and was pretty happy about being away from the other ponies.  Harley thought he should come back to us and help us look for the secret hay, so he started jumping around.  That made the lady laugh a little.  She found a stump in the woods and got on Harley's back while the other lady climbed on Haylie.  Then they disappeared into the woods for a little while.  We ran around in the field and yelled for them to come back.  It was really horrible to think that they were out there getting stuff we couldn't have.  (Except for Toby, he laid on the ground and rolled and turned himself from a gray pony into a brown pony.)  Then they came back and came in through the hay gate.  We STILL didn't get any hay.  Our lady got off Harley and got on Toby, even though he was brown.  We told Haylie we were going to bite her as soon as that other lady was done giving her treats, but the other lady gave us some treats too.  Our lady told Toby he had to carry her back to the other side of the pasture and then we remembered that there was hay over there in the green truck thing.  HOORAY!  So we galloped back over there as fast as we could. (Our lady got off Toby and let him gallop with us, rather than getting thrown off in the mud.)  Then we finally got our hay.  It was a harrowing afternoon.                          

Safety Guide for deer season

This time of year, many ladies who sit on ponies are afraid to go out in the woods around here because they have concerns for their safety when the "deer hunters" are prowling about.  So I have decided to compile some safety tips for the deer hunters.
Tip #1:  Deer hunters should know what their quarry looks like.  Almost all White-tailed deer are grayish-brown.  They have four legs and some of them have antlers like trees growing on their heads.  So if you see something that is white or black or has spots on it, it is probably not a deer.  Even baby deer don't have spots on them this time of year.  Since you don't have an exotic animal-killing license, you shouldn't shoot at it.
Tip #2:  If it has clothing on it, it is not a deer.  Deer hardly ever wear coats, or hats or blankets.
Tip #3:  If you see it inside a fenced area, don't shoot at it.  This means that if you climbed over or cut through a fence, and now you see something that might be a deer, too bad, it is not your deer to shoot at. That just the way it is. 
Tip#4:  If you see something in the woods and you are not sure if it is a deer, you can yell out to it and ask it. If it says "Yes, I am a deer" -- Do NOT shoot it!"  That is called sarcasm, and deer are never sarcastic.  Only people are sarcastic.  Do not shoot people. If it runs away, it might have been a deer. Oh well, maybe now you will know for next time.  
Tip #5:  You can look up what deer look like on the internet, where there are lots of pictures and videos.  (Like this one  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=khKrd1RNy2U ) You can also see them in movies about Santa Claus and Bambi.         

Apples

So every day, the lady comes back to see us and brings us good stuff to eat.  For a while she brought us hay.  But the nice grass was growing so she stopped that. Other ladies come to visit us too and the ladies sit on some of our backs and give us lots of treats.  I always want our lady to sit on my back, but sometimes she does and sometimes she doesn't.  For awhile, it was Sienna every day.  Sienna didn't want the lady to get up high and be on top of her back.  So she would walk around and around the big stump that the lady stands on until I thought that lady was going to fall right over. Whenever the lady takes us over to the stump, she gets really tall, and then she leans over and puts her front feet on our backs. (Her front feet are wiggly and are always holding on to stuff, since the lady hardly ever uses her mouth to pick stuff up the right way.)  When you feel her foot on your back, you are supposed to stop and then the lady will make a sound with her mouth and you get something to eat!  It is great fun. As soon as you hear her say "Mount Up"  you should go stand next to a stump. Not all the ponies know this as well as some of us smarter ponies. Sienna didn't like when the lady got tall and she especially didn't want to stand there when the lady leaned on her. She took up a lot of time that the lady could have been giving us other ponies treats by walking in circles.  Finally the lady sat on her back, but it was still another week before the lady was able to sit on her back and Sienna figured out how to walk and stop.  I can do that really good now.  Me and my sister Gypsy have been practicing bunches of times and we try to teach the lady to give us treats.  The lady is confused much of the time and has us walking in the wrong direction (away from our friends) and sometimes we go over big logs instead of logically walking around them.  We put up with her because of the treats.  Another lady comes and sits on top of Haylie or my mom Tudi. Haylie gets apples because they walk over to the apple tree and then that lady reaches up and pulls apples right off the tree. So as soon as that lady gets on her back, Haylie wants to walk to the next field and get apples so we all follow to see if we can get some apples too.  Our regular lady sits on different ponies when she isn't messing around with Sienna, Billy or Harley or Tux or Toby or one of us shorter ponies.  If she sits on Harley, Harley gets very happy and jumps around.  Sometimes he jumps over logs, and sometimes he just jumps. He is exuberant. And sometimes Harley and Haylie and the ladies go through the gate and walk around in the woods.  When those ponies come back, they think they are way cooler than the rest of us, even tho they are really sweaty.   Then Harley paws with his foot and lays down and rolls and the lady gives him treats for doing that.  But usually, we just get apples for being here when the ladies show up.  They pull the little green truck thing up to the fence and yell "Ponies!"  And then it starts raining apples. The apples are bouncing every which direction, so we have to run after them and try to get them before Billy or Harley or Gypsy do.  We love apples!